Better! Better get a Bucket...

It's been a couple weeks since I've written...sorry about that...don't give up on me though...I'm still hanging tough! I may not always feel like writing but it all comes back around eventually. As you can probably tell or have already heard...I am feeling better right now.

Ah, the holidays...started with a bang!
This was the 1st Thanksgiving with all the 1st cousins from the Elleman side of the family since the 80's!

Still crazy after all these years!


This was the scene before digestion began...or tried to begin.



Thanksgiving dinner went down pretty well...I just had a tad of everything...but even that was more than my system was use to eating. I moaned awhile before going home...there the moaning got worse...I moaned in bed...I moaned in the bathroom...I threw in some gags trying to make myself sick about a dozen times...no go...I moaned to the doctor on call...I was soon moaning to my mom over the phone...time to take another trip to the emergency room. She arrived in moments with all the cousins following behind.

It was close to 10pm...but the ER got me right in...(one of the perks of cancer)..."Must be me in the front row."

Relief was soon on the way...pain meds distributed...x-rays and scans began. Obstructed bowel was the verdict and admittance was to follow. It was after 2am when I arrived to see my buddies on Main 5 - The Cancer Institute. I was feeling relief...we'd wait 'til morning to see what the Dr. suggests. By 4am...Mom and I get some in and out shut eye... before Doctors were storming in...flipping on lights...hollering about eating too much turkey...then barking orders.

The nurses were instructed: Up the nose with a plastic hose...and down the back of the throat into my stomach. I won't go into any more details but my system was cleaned out. The goal was to decompress my innerds...rest the bowel...nothing to eat or drink...throw in an ice chip here or there...let the kink work itself out...and it was highly unlikely that I would be leaving that day. Please keep in mind...it is now Friday after Thanksgiving...one of the biggest nights of the year for me...especially this year.

This evening was to be the:

T-shirts had been printed and caters were cooking...The Party Must Go On...without me!

It did.

I slept through most of it...in and out between the late night drunk dialers...I was missed and it sounds like I missed a BiG oNe! It is estimated that over 100 people were in attendance. For those who were there...from the old neighborhood to high school to family and the best of friends...thank you...I love you all!

Thank God for Football...

I would have gone crazy had football not been on this weekend...I'm not sure what I'll do when the season's over...maybe...get off my fat butt and do something!

That's all I did all weekend...watch college games on Saturday and NFL on Sunday...(not unlike most men out there)...no wonder my kid can't stand football. I tried getting out Saturday night...the Scott's, Backous' & McVay's went to Buffalo Wild Wings to celebrated Kyle's making of the basketball team...special shout out to Kyle Michael...WaWho!

Zoey and Katey went into there special world together...I tried a beer...it didn't like me much...then all the commotion...MU vs. Iowa St. on every big screen...place packed to the gills...wings flying out to all the tables with a dozen different sauce flavors mixing in the air...overstimulating my senses...making me want to puke!

I tried joining the smokers outside for some fresh air...(is that ironic or an oxymoron?)...it didn't seem to work. Once we returned to the table...food was being served...first thing I did was scan the table and saw an empty beer glass within reach just in case...I quickly asked for my potato wedges to go...pawned my child off on a friend for the night...then gracefully bowed out of the joint before my stomach bowed out on the table.

I was better once I got home...crawled in my bed...and slept until the Chiefs' game the next day.
I should have just kept on sleeping..............

Back Amongst the Living...

Last weeks chemo round wasn't as bad as the 1st round...I wasn't as sick in the nausea department but I sure did pumped out the zzzzzz's! I could have slept straight through Thursday & Friday of last week...almost did...but I'm coming around now...didn't even nap once on Sunday! I think I may be able to stay awake long enough to go back to work for a bit this week...call me crazy...but it sounds like fun...(shows you how exciting my life has been lately)!

CA125 = 449!

Before my surgery less than a month ago...my CA125 was over 1900...the high reading was due to all the fluid that was in my body. Once that was all removed...followed by my 1st round of chemo...ChemoMan did some ass kicking and it dropped to 449!

Round 1 was definitely successful at killing off all my hair cells. I tried hanging on as long as I could but once the hair covered my pillow and woke me up in the middle of the night because it was in my mouth...I said "bye bye". Tracy & Zoey did the honors...cut and clipped as low as possible...Mom and I finished it off last night with old fashion shaving cream and a triple bladed razor...smooth as a baby's butt!

I'm heading into the hospital today so ChemoMan can continue on his conquest...Round 2 should be about 36 hours...not sure if I'll be home late Tuesday or early Wednesday...whatever the case...I'll be there visualizing yet another successful battle.

Say Goodbye to my Hair...Again!

Never been bald during winter...this should be fun!

Apparently the chemo is working...I'm definitely loosing my hair...in droves down south...still hanging tight and being gentle with the northern hemisphere...but it too will be gone soon.

I also believe that the crappier I feel after chemo...the better ChemoMan's mission is going. He's down there just reaking havoc with no mercy on those weak ass cells...kill 'em all ChemoMan...kill 'em all!

So as crappy as I felt after the 1st round...I'm confident this last battle was won by the good guys...round 2 is coming up on Monday...I'll be in the hospital about 36 hours or so. I don't expect this round to be as bad...I was just off surgery when they hit me with the 1st dose...but I asked for it. BRING IT ON!

Overdue Update...Oct. 23, 2008

Sorry I haven't kept you all updated lately...but most of you know what has been going on. Surgery was 2 weeks ago...Dr. D. wasn't able to get rid of the cancer physically so we will attack it chemically! She was able to put a drain in my abdomen so that excessive fluid will no longer weigh me down...losing 30 lbs. of fluid alone is a huge deal for how I'm feeling right now. Apparently, cancer cells produce this fluid...I can't tell you how uncomfortable I've been for weeks prior to surgery..."not enough to drain"...my ass! She drained 6 liters which is equivalent to 24 pounds of fluid all in my abdomen...surrounding my stomach...suffocating my lungs...running down my thighs...bloating my calves...swelling my eyes...it's been the best party of them all!

The drain she installed is a tube that protrudes from my abdomen and runs into a bag that Velcros around my calf...I can drain it anytime. It will also helps us to indicate if chemo is working...fluid is one of the first things that chemo clears up...so we will be monitoring that and my CA125 very closely. So far, I've been draining about a beer can a day.

I had surgery on Wednesday 10/08...chemo in the hospital the following Monday. I watched the movie "IronMan" the night before chemo and I imagined IronMan being ChemoMan inside my body...blasting away all the cancer! I told my Dr.'s therapist and the next day she came in with a gift...it was an IronMan action figure. He's sitting next to me right now as I type...reminding me to visualize the casualties of cancer cells exiting my body.

Monday...they started pre-meds in the morning about 9am...then the Taxol cocktail for 24 hours at about 4pm. It ran through me until the following afternoon...then they gave me 2 hours of fluid...followed by the 2nd cocktail they poured through my port for a couple hours...chase that all with 2 more hours of fluid. I was done by Tuesday night about 9pm. All in all...the 36 hour chemo treatment went pretty well...they let me out Wednesday AM...I was ready to get home to be with my kid! My niece, Katie Jo, came in town on Thursday...her and Mom stayed at my house with us. It was great having her around and I felt pretty good until Saturday...that's when the steroids wore off and the nausea began. In the past, I've never had much nausea to speak of...I'm getting a taste of it now.

Today is Thursday...the morning went well...that time of day usually is my worst. Nausea has just started to sink in a little after lunch...but not nearly as bad as it has been...I'm turning the corner. I will be doing 30 hour chemo treatments in the hospital once every 3 weeks...next time will be Nov. 3rd.

My stomach has definitely shrunk and I get scared about eating...but I have and I'm feeling stronger everyday!

It's so much easier to feel positive when your heart and stomach are no longer in the pit of your gut.